the best singlehood night of my life.

alright. that’s an exaggeration. but it was a good one.

so, the other day, i was a teensy tinsy overwhelmed.
there are many things happening. all at once.
with projects at work. and projects back home.
and  100cameras events. in time warner center.
have you ever seen time warner. in columbus circle?

and, well. i am public relations director for 100cameras.

and, well. i couldn’t possibly like a role more.
i like asking questions. i like searching for sponsorships.
i like that there aren’t rubrics for the how or when.

i like talking to the people and places and companies and press.
but i have to be honest with you. it’s up and down.
and then down and up again. and that morning, it was down. and,
there’s some stress that comes with the down of public relations.
and we need a particular sponsorship. and sooner than expected.
and i can’t find this.

anywhere.
i can’t i can’t i can’t.

and i was telling elly this. that i can’t. and she said,
keep your head up, ang. keep the faith.

and i said,
i can’t i can’t i can’t. everyone says their budget is economy limited.

and nannsie said,
angie. god knows what we need. stress is not from god.

and emsie said,
sweetie. how can i help you. tell me how i can help you.

and, then i decided to take a stress-free walk. down rivington street.
and walked inside this restaurant. and i asked this woman, sarah.
if they could give me this particular sponsorship. sarah said no.
but.
she told me,

that i should go to dizzy’s on the fifth floor of time warner.
and ask for LA and roland.

su-weeeet.
sarah, can i use your name as a reference? great, thanks.

and then after work, i went to dizzy’s. now,
i should have googled what the heck a dizzy could be.
but i didn’t have time. so, i just went for it.
and, i walked out of the elevator on the fifth floor.
and oh wow.

it’s just….oh, you know…. another black tie affair.

quick, blend in.

and i tried my best.
i wandered around with my head slight-ly above parallel.

[always keep your head above parallel when you oopsy-daisy-walk
into a black tie affair. and always make intentional eye contact.]

and this tactic worked for…well, not long. not long at all. because
then, the meryl streep look-a-like employee approached me.
quick, abort eye contact. avert eyes. avert eyes!
but no luck.

meryl asked, honey, can i help you.

oh no. think fast.
hi, i am here to meet with roland and LA.

meryl nodded,oh yes, yes. they are inside dizzy’s.     

do what? inside of what. what the heck is a dizzy.
could you point me towards inside?

meryl had a slight georgian accent.
yes ma’am. just pass this line, and take a right.

pass this line? and all of these fancy people?
are they going to throw spit wads in my hair.

her eyes started to cross,
ma’am, what is a spitwad.

great. now, i’d done it. i confused meryl.
uh, so take a right? great, thanks.

and i walked inside dizzy’s. without a black tie reservation.
and hello secret gem of new york city.
one of the number one jazz clubs,
this can’t be reality. i like a good jazz soul session.
and i’ve been craving a good live music session.

hi, i am here to meet with LA and roland. they don’t know i am coming.

they were busy.
so, i asked when the best time would be to stop in.
and the lady behind the counter softened.
and pointed me to a table in the back. and told me to wait.

and i thought that was fair.
and then insert the best singlehood night of my life here:
go ahead, click play. for the soundtrack.
and meet, rene marie and the jazz artists.

 

she’s quality, eh.

one of the best jazz artists in the country.
accompanied by,
shrimp jambalaya with dizzy’s ring leaders, LA and roland.

that’s right, they found time to listen to the vision of 100cameras.
and then roland thought i would like the evening line-up. he said i should stay.

so i stayed. and roland was right. what an organic evening.
[i have this thing for organic experiences.]

with a shout-out from the jazz headliner, rene:

i want to thank you all for being here tonight.
i feel your energy. and this jazz wouldn’t be the same
if you weren’t here with me. you are a part of its soul.
especially you. all the way in the back.
who, me?
yes, you. the girl with the poufy hair.

oh, rene. that sweet sweet singing rene.

i have to tell you. i went to church that night.
that night at dizzy’s with rene marie.
the way she sang. she pinned every note.
the way the piano challenged every rhythm. like,
is he going to fit all of those notes inside that music measure
…or…i mean…
can he really fit all of those notes inside that music measure.

he always managed to fit every note inside the music measure.
he played with utter soul. and the manhattan skyline behind the music.

and i thought, that i won’t remember this evening with anyone. because
it’s just me and dizzy. and me and my goosebumps. and i then i thought
about the people i would share that moment with. because in moments
like that, you have to be picky. not all friends would seep into that
deepness with me. which is good, keeps it interesting and all.

you know, how every friendship has it’s niche.

but there are some still-frames, where i want to share my moments.
with someone,
who will appreciate my goosebumps. and maybe have their own.
who will attend church with both me and dizzy. and these jazzy notes,
oh, these jazzy notes. and the way each instrument flirted with the other.
they reminded me. that everyone enjoys a good measure in their own way.

and it’s this closeness with the off-beat meter. that is the metronome to my new york days.

[i was an intense pianist, until i discovered baton twirling. so, i know about metronomes.]

and, i was so thankful. thankful for this, because
i don’t really know how i actually ended up in new york city.
the way it happened, with the one-way ticket and all.
it is – well - just outside of my mind.

i do not know, how i left my sweet home.
with my sweet community and marms and dad.
and the comfort of thomasville road.
i don’t know how i said goodbye to my dog, zaccheus.but i do know this. i left home, and it is so right.
rene marie at dizzy’s in columbus circle reminded me,
this is my jazz. new york city is my jazz.

this chaotic balance of life and sponsorships is so – jazzy.

it’s a beautiful mixing pot of always, and faithfully, flowing together.

that the jazz-ness always works out for the best of the music measure.

and, it does feel good to know i have some jazz rooted inside of me.

it’s also nice to know, that i now have the inside-in with roland.
and he thinks i will like may. because it is music celebration month.

so, some of you need to get your goosebump-loving-self up here.
and asap. but until then, here’s another little ditty from rene marie.

i title this one, a spoken word about america.

turn this soundtrack up. while you’re brushing your teeth for bed.

and putting in your retainers. or, is that just me.

Tags: a prose essay., city love., for the girlsies., newyorkcity state of mind., some GOSPEL thoughts., transparent thoughts.